#anyway caffeine addiction is very bad for your body and if you cannot make it through the day without it thats bad lol

[anotherpapercut]

I love how posts about addiction will go majorly out of their way to mention weed but NOT caffeine, addiction to which is extremely common and can be very dangerous

[laedraws]

I had to exercise myself with writing and I found a prompt generator. This is probably very bad but I tried

Warning: language

Your prompt: Eddie is the barista at a coffee shop and always screws up Richie’s name on purpose + Your prompt: Richie hates coffee, but goes to a coffee shop and drinks some just so they can see Eddie, who works there

Richie Tozier enters the coffee shop that’s across the street the way he always does.

It’s quiet, and it’s a nice change from all the noise he’s usually exposed to.

Eddie Kaspbrak walked through the same door hours ago, half an hour before the start of his shift. He’s not thrilled about his job, but it’s not the worst he could be doing, either.

It’s quiet, and it’s a nice change from all the noise his thoughts make inside his head.

Richie Tozier hesitates only a few seconds before taking his place in line, not needing to mentally rehearse his order.

Eddie Kaspbrak has had anxiety all of his life, he still checks every order twice, despite knowing each one by heart.

Richie Tozier hates coffee. Don’t get him wrong, he usually gladly throws himself onto everything that could possibly make him develop some sort of addiction; but the light adrenaline wave coffee provides just isn’t worth the shitty taste.

Eddie Kaspbrak has learnt from a very young age that sometimes you have to just pinch your nose and swallow whatever substance your body does (or doesn’t) need. He grew up weak, and medicines helped him, or so his mother said. Caffeine was just another help, a boost for when his useless body claimed sleep too early or too often. A necessity, really.

Richie Tozier hated caffeine, but ordered a cup of coffee anyway. He always did, because the only reason he even entered the coffee nearly every other day was to tell said order to the brown eyed boy working at the counter.

Eddie Kaspbrak saw him the moment he got in line. He ordered the same thing every day, and it was the only time of the day Eddie didn’t need to repeat the order in his head until he had handed the cup to the customer in line.

Richie smiled, Eddie smirked.

“Your name?”

Your name is Richie. I know this. I heard your friends call after you. I heard you saying it yourself while you were trying to sound professional on the phone. You failed, by the way.

“Richie”

Please remember it right this time. I spelled it clearly, for you. I’m only here because of you. Fuck. I don’t even care how much this shit’s overpriced if I get to hear you call me correctly for once. (I want to hear my name on your lips)

Eddie grabbed a sharpie and scribbled something onto the soft cardboard. It made a soothing sound and he dared to quickly look up to the other, curly black hair partly hiding the huge frame of his glasses. He looked so hopeful Eddie almost felt bad.

It’s a cute name really. R-I-C-H-I-E. Has a nice ring to it, too. It would be a shame if someone put a T in there.

He finished writing, turned the cup so that Richie couldn’t see it, and moved to make his coffee. Cupboards sounds tingled in the air. He was aware of Richie’s presence somewhere behind him, but it didn’t make him nervous. He wasn’t overthinking for once. It was their little game, or Eddie’s at least, if the other somehow hadn’t caught up yet.

“Here you go” he said as he finished pouring it, half smiling but carefully avoiding the other’s eyes.

Richie smiled back and took his coffee, then quickly stopped in his tracks.

Are you fucking kid-

“-ding me?”

Eddie turned around, eyebrow raised.

Him and his fucking trashmouth. While he mentally zeroed any possibility he may have had with the cute boy from the shop he could clearly hear the distinct voice of Stanley Uris himself, telling him to stop being so freaking loud all the time. Serves him well for never listening to Stan the Man.

“Is something wrong?”

If Eddie was having a mini panic attack the moment he heard Richie complain (which he was), he didn’t show it.

And then something incredible happened, something so rare it could be comparable to the passage of some comets in the sky. Richie Tozier was left speechless.

“I-“ he started, flushing through his pale skin. “I’m sorry” he finished. “I just…was wondering how you think it’s pronounced? Maybe RiTchy?” He added, a sincere smile softening the joke.

It took some seconds for Eddie to blink away his confusion and pick up that the other was in fact fucking with him.

“You pay for the coffee, not for accuracy”

What the actual fuck was that, Kaspbrak.

“Excuse me?” It was Richie’s turn to be confused now.

“We put names on the cups so they don’t get mixed up, it’s a practical tip which also happens to do wonders for health codes, ‘cause imagine picking someone else’s cup that’d be so anti-hygienic and have you ever heard of a staph infection-”

Richie had honestly lost himself trying to follow the other’s train of thoughts, the only thing he could think about was that all the rambling made the boy in front of him look strangely cute.

“…and basically my point is that in the end the name is not really relevant for the service, so-”

(cute, cute, cute)

“Well yeah okay I’m sorry, I got it, I was kind of a dick-” And then Richie snorted because of course, he had to add “A Dick, get it? Because my name’s Richard?”

The barista blinked, but otherwise had no response. If Stan had been there, he would have smacked Richie in the head, which, fair enough. He suddenly became painfully aware of the line growing behind him.

“Alright, for real now, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bother you, just… uh, you’ve been butchering my name for weeks now and I guess I overthought it a little? Thought that maybe you didn’t like me which, I guess you’d be right in doing after this..”

Eddie felt like the shittiest person on the planet because you see, Richie’s eyes looked like those of a kicked dog behind those stupid glasses.

So when the other reached for his money and paid, muttering a ‘keep the change’ under his breath, Eddie took a deep sigh and- where’s my inhaler when I need it?

“It’s Eddie!”

“Uh?” Richie turned around, the cup of coffee still warm in his hand, the steam fogging the base of his glasses.

“Eddie. It’s my name. In case you wanna butcher it back”

As Richie looked at him Eddie felt his cheeks go down two shades. And then a wide, heartfelt grin pictured himself on the black haired boy’s face and Eddie felt his chest relax as if he really took a huge spray out of his inhaler.

“Nice one” he decided, and then, as a grin formed on his face: “Mind if I call you Eds?”

Eddie shook his head. Yes, he did mind, but he guessed they were even now.

“No” he lied while moving to the next costumer: “I owe you one”

And with that Richie could have considered himself satisfied, really. Not only the cute boy- Eddie, he quickly reminded himself, would call him by his correct name from now on, but Richie knew his, too.

You could just have asked, he heard Stan’s voice echo in his mind.

But isn’t it enough to just sit into my Hawaiian shirt, lovestruck? He would have probably said back.

(Yes that is the variation of a meme I just quoted. No, Stan, I physically cannot talk ‘normal’)

And so he refused to walk through the door, lingering on the back of the counter, respectfully out of line: “That’s nice to know, Eds. How about Eddie Spaghetti?”

That’s where Eddie drew the line.

“I said I owed you one, don’t push it”, but he was smiling.

Richie noticed it, and that’s why he said: “Alright Spaghetti-head”

He forgot he was holding coffee, because the smug face he was picturing having fell apart as he took a sip of his drink and almost spit it all out. Luckily the other  was too busy to notice it.

Eddie handed the order to his current costumer, and forgot all about work policies and ‘professionalism’ as he absent-mindedly slipped in a conversation with the boy he had been purposely misnaming for weeks: “Beep-beep Richie”

“Did you just beeped me?” Richie added, faking indignation.

“Yeah, you’re annoying”. But there was no serious tone in his voice. Then, he quickly added: “Can I ask you something?”

Richie was glowing: “Yeah, sure”

“Why don’t you order something else if you dislike coffee?”

Richie’s heart did something funny in his chest as he realized he was panicking in his spot.

“Huh?”

“Yeah I can see you throwing it away as you walk out, you know. The poor plant outside has probably become addicted to caffeine by now. At first I thought it was me, that I had fucked up your order or something. That’s why I started to spell your name wrong, I was pissed because I thought you didn’t like the service or something. And I used to check every time, and I’m pretty sure that I had done alright”

Richie started to understand how Stan must feel while dealing with his shenanigans, because he suddenly had the urge to smack himself in the head, too.

“Oh fuck, I’m sorry if you thought that! I swear it has nothing to do with you-

(It has everything to do with you, just not in the way you’d think)

“-I just like coming here, and it wouldn’t sit well with me if I didn’t support the place, somehow. Does it make sense?”

Eddie didn’t look too convinced but he wasn’t one to push people too much. He just nodded and bit his lip, going on another tour to the coffee machine.

“If that’s how it is then, I was thinking, how about I make you another one? Another order, I mean. One that you actually like. I promise I’ll spell your name right this time”

“That’d be cool, actually. Do you have anything with chocolate?”

Eddie smiles and gestures him to go back in line.

Richie patiently waits, and when Eddie hands him his new order he forgets about checking his name’s spelling. He smiles at Eddie and maybe stares a little too long before thanking him and finally walking out the place.

It’s only when he passes the poor plant he’d been accidentally feeding with caffeine that he remembers the previous conversation.

On the cup, truth to his word, Eddie wrote “Richie”, the clear handwriting striking on the white cardboard. Under it, there’s a row of numbers Richie takes some seconds too long to decipher.

When it finally hits him, it makes his body warm despite the weather and a sincere smile brightens his face.

Richie Tozier goes home and doesn’t hear the noises of the street over the memory of Eddie’s voice he’s playing in his head.

Eddie Kaspbrak finishes his shift hours later, takes out his umbrella and lets the sound of the rain silence his overthinking, as thoughts of Richie bloom at the edge of his mind.

[lovemesomesurveys]

● Name something you lost or gave away that can never be replaced. A lot of time wasted.  “I wasted my time...”   ��� What 5 websites do you visit often, and why? Tumblr, YouTube, Twitter, Facebook, and Pinterest.  ● Name a totally useless possession and how you came to acquire it. Some would consider knickknacks and collectibles and stuff useless, and I mean yeah they just sit on a shelf, but I like stuff like that.  ● What music album would be used for a movie about your life? I don’t know. ● List your bad habits and/or addictions and what you have tried to rid yourself of them. I got a lot of bad habits. As for addictions, caffeine and my pain medicine. I don’t abuse it, I take it as prescribed, but after so long your body develops a dependency. I remember several years ago I tried to cut out caffeine. It lasted a couple days, I think. haha. The headaches are no joke.

● If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be, and what would you do if later on you changed your mind? There’s a long list of things I’d want to change, but I mean if I could have good health (mentally and physically) that would make a big difference. I think some other changes would follow. I can’t imagine I’d ever change my mind about that. ● What are your religious beliefs? Have they changed, or have they always stayed the same? I’m a Christian now. Up until 4 years ago I was atheist and then agnostic.  ● When was your last food craving, and what did you crave? I’ve been wanting Doritos tacos from Taco Bell lately. ● Who was your first crush and what made them special? This kid named Philip when I was in 3rd grade. He was a grade or two above me. He and I were turning the jump rope for people during this event my elementary school had every year called, Jump Rope for Heart. It was to get people active and raise awareness. Anyway, he was across from me holding the other end of the rope and I just thought he was cute haha.  ● Name your most cherished childhood memory. I have a lot of those. I loved my childhood. It wasn’t without struggle or obstacles, but for some reason those things aren’t what stand out the most. I was a strong, resilient kid. Kid me would be so ashamed of how weak I am now. ● Turn to an entry in your journal or diary from a year or more ago. What has changed and what has stayed the same since then? I don’t feel like looking back on old surveys right now. ● What is one thing nobody knows about you because nobody ever cared to ask? Hmm. ● Robert Frost write a poem titled The Road Not Taken. Name a road you’ve always wanted to travel. Where do you hope it takes you, and what might you see on the way? Wait, literally or metaphorically? I mean, metaphorically I’d like to take the road that takes me to working on myself and leading to some happiness and success. That’d be nice.  ● Name one thing you always wanted to do, but haven’t. What has prevented you from doing it? Uhh there’s a lot of things. I feel like I’ve wasted so much time in my life each passing year. I’m just wasting away. I want to just...live. Travel more. Do something with my life. My physical health has been a contributing factor, but ultimately it’s me. It’s my mental health. That affects me more than anything else. ● Write about your first kiss. Was it everything you wished or hoped it would be? It happened behind the drama department at my high school. It unexpected and awkward, but it was my first kiss so it was all I knew. I was so giddy about having had my first kiss it didn’t matter haha. ● What was the worst mistake or decision you have ever made in life? What could you have done differently? Oh jeez. I have a lot of regrets. One that weighs heavily on me in recent years relates to my health. I’m very stubborn. I should have taken better care of myself. I should have neglected certain things. Some things don’t just go away, they get worse. And here I am, still not taking care of myself like I should be. Each passing year... ● What song was stuck in your head recently, and what were you doing at the time that made you think of it? I Love Me by Demi Lovato. I just really like the song.

● Write about something you now know that you wish you knew earlier in life. How could this knowledge have helped you? Just going back to the big thing that’s been weighing heavily on my mind these past few years that I talked about up there. ● Write about your greatest fear. Death, losing loved ones, never getting better/getting worse, and never doing anything with my life. ● Name one thing you feel brings out the good in people. Hmm. ● Describe a time in your life when everything turned out fine, despite the odds. I mean, there have been some times where things turned out to be not as bad as I thought they would be.  ● If you invented a device that could fix one problem you are facing right now, would you use it? What problem would you like to solve? I’ve talked about it enough.  ● Write about the last time you spoke to your best friend. What did you talk about? Last night when my mom got home from work. She was just telling me about stuff that happened at work and the latest Coronavirus news. It’s a wild time right now. All the cancellations of events, school campuses closing, and empty shelfs because people are stockpiling on hand sanitizer, face masks, and toilet paper. Italy is quarantined. I’ve never witnessed anything like this. ● Describe a time you felt alone. I feel that way a lot. I don’t spend a lot of time physically alone, but I still feel alone a lot. ● Name something you found; what was it and where did you find it? Uhh earlier I found a new ASMR channel on YouTube to watch haha. ● What’s on your calendar for tomorrow? I have a doctor appointment.  ● What is the most annoying sound you have ever heard? Eating sounds make my skin crawl.  ● Describe your first job. I’ve never had one.  ● What is the one thing you cannot live without? Besides oxygen, food, and water; my family. And coffee. That doesn’t get lumped into food or water, coffee gets its own honorable mention.  ● Quote the nicest thing anyone has ever said about you. Lane said I was strong, beautiful, brave, and rocked red hair like nobody’s business. :D ● Are you afraid of the dark? Why or why not? I can’t sleep if it’s completely dark or quiet, which is why I sleep with the TV on. I’d be scared if the electricity went out and it was dark if I was home alone. I wouldn’t go anywhere alone at night. Even with with someone I’m heightened alert. ● Describe the longest amount of time you have ever been away from home. A week. ● Write about a recent adventure or travels. I went to Disneyland for a few days last month. It was awesome. ● Who did you idolize growing up? My mom and grandma. And some celebrities at the time that were around my age like Hilary Duff. ● Name a celebrity or famous person you wish would take you out on a date. Alexander Skarsgard. ● Describe your daily routine when you get out of bed in the morning. Take my medicine, use the restroom, have coffee.  ● Name one thing you have always been good at doing. Jumping to the worst case scenarios. ● What is your favorite season, and why? Fall and winter. I love the weather, the clothes, the scents, the holidays, and just the coziness of it all. ● What was the title of the last book you read? I’m currently reading, “The Girl That Vanished” by A.J. Rivers. It’s the sequel to, “The Girl in Cabin 13.” ● List your biggest regrets. I talked about one of them already. That’s enough for today. ● Have you ever seen a ghost? No. ● Describe your note-taking style and habits. Bullet points, underlining, asterisks, and highlighting.  ● Do you believe that we are all here for a reason? What might the reason be? Yes. You have to figure that out for yourself, we all have a different purpose. I’m still trying to figure mine out. ● What comes to mind when someone uses the phrase prolonging the magic? I’ve never heard that phrase. ● Have you ever done something just to feel the danger, or to feel alive? Drinking, smoking weed, and taking a ride in a truck at night on a backroad at night near a levee. That was scary, but definitely an adrenaline rush.  ● What is your favorite cliché? Actions speak louder than words. ● What are all your thoughts on god? I believe in God.  ● How do rainy days make you feel? I love rainy days. I do the same things I do any other day, but it’s just cozy. The sound is relaxing. ● What is the most amount of money you have had at one time? A couple grand. ● Write a celebrity crush list. Alexander Skarsgard. ● What is the most amazing thing you have ever seen, heard, or experienced? I couldn’t pick just one thing. ● What effect does music have on you? It can perk me up, it can give me a little energy if I need to clean, it can make me sad, it can make me zone out, it can make me relax.  ● What did you learn today? What did you learn yesterday? Uhhh. ● What 5 traits do people first notice when they meet you for the first time? I’m sure the very first thing they notice is I’m in a wheelchair. Then probably how thin I am. Then perhaps my hair and my black rimmed glasses. Maybe my freckles. ● Have you ever carved your name or initials into a tree or stone? No. ● Does Never Never Land really exist? No, sadly.  “Cause Neverland is home, to lost boys like me...” ● Where is a great place to get breakfast? This local place that’s known more for their burgers, fries, and shakes, but actually have bomb breakfast, too. I love their country gravy. ● List 3 things that went right (or wrong) today. It’s only 2 in the morning, but so far I had ramen, I’m finishing up my Starbucks Doubleshot energy drink, and I’m watching/listening to an ASMR video. Not a bad start, but we’ll see how the rest of the day goes... I have a doctor appointment later that I’m not looking forward to. Afterwards my mom and I are going grocery shopping and I’ll probably pick up Wingstop on the way home. It’s been hot lately and I’ve had a nagging headache the past couple days, so I hope that isn’t the case today. ● What is the best method of travel, and in what ways have you traveled? Car and plane.  ● If you could give the world just one thing, what would it be? Peace. ● What were your best and worst subjects in school or college? English throughout school, with the addition of psychology in college. My worst was always math. I struggled with science, too. Philosophy was really fucking hard. ● Describe the most outrageous thing anyone has dared you to do. I haven't really been dared to do anything too outrageous.  ● Ice cream: chocolate, vanilla, or strawberry? Strawberry, but vanilla is good as well.  ● What historical events happened the year you were born? Ted Bundy was electrocuted.  ● Pick up a random object that has special meaning to you and describe it in as much detail as possible. I’m on my bed and there’s 2 giraffe stuffed animals, one is a big squishy one. I love all my giraffe stuffed animals, which there are a LOT of. ● Write about a recent visit to a museum or art gallery. I visited a Walt Disney museum a couple years ago. It was really cool. ● What food items do you consider staples in a well-balanced diet? I’m the wrong person to ask about well balanced diets. Well balanced for me is Wingstop, ramen, this pizza from my favorite local pizza place, scrambled eggs, and coffee. haha. ● Describe your feelings in regards to an issue in todays society, and what would be done to fix it. I talked about the coronavirus, which is a big issue and hot topic currently, and my feelings to it already. ● If you had only one wish, what would you wish for? Cures for all diseases. ● If you could tell the world just one thing, what would you say? Wash your hands!  ● Share a dirty little secret about yourself (or someone else). Nah. ● Have you ever gone skinny dipping? Noooo. ● Name something you would like to devote more time to seeing or doing. I need to devote time to taking care of myself and taking some necessary steps. ● What is the name of your favorite book, magazine, or publication? I have too many favorite books. ● Describe your first car. I’ve never had my own car. I don’t drive. ● Thunderstorms… Inspiring or scary? I love them.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #251

apologies the formatting is fucked up, oof.

How many smurfs can you name? Zero. Have you ever fully eradicated a bad habit that you had? Uhhh maybe? I'm not sure. The radio is playing U2, The Defects, Echo & the Bunnymen, The Pointer Sisters, Staubkind, and Dr. Dre. on different stations. Which band are you most likely to listen to? I only know U2 (and do NOT like them), Dr. Dre, and one song by E&TB; I don't know the others. I guess I'd pick whichever song sounded most appealing. Miracle on 34th Street, original or remake? Never seen it. Have you ever been in a parade? No. Do you turn the bass up all the way in your car (or would you if you had a car) and blast the music? Ew, no. That shit's obnoxious. What keeps you from being happy? I'm quiiiite sad of an adult. I want to feel worth something, do something. If you could go back in time and talk to yourself five years ago what would you say to yourself (You can only stay in the past for FIVE MINUTES so make it COUNT!)? At that time, Jason and I would still be together, so I'd try to nail it into my head that I can't put my happiness entirely in another person's hands and that I have to have faith in myself and my own strength. AND ESPECIALLY to not give up, to keep trying harder every day. Five minutes wouldn't be enough. What websites are addictive to you? I'd go bonkers without YouTube, and I go through Tumblr binges, but then don't go on for a few days. I have to check KM daily, but it's not really an "addictive" thing, but rather the admin instinct of I have to make sure everything is in order. I check Facebook habitually, but only like, once or twice a day. Who do you never want to end up like? It's... sad to say, but in a lot of ways, my mom. Her life's just been super, super unfair. As a person she's mostly lovely, but as far as luck, happiness, and success goes, sometimes it feels like the whole world's against her. What will you never ever do again? Turn another person into my whole entire universe. What’s the most terrible lie someone could tell you? Something regarding Jason, I'm sure. Probably like, he said he never loved me or something. Even knowing that's absolute shit, PTSD is a ride and I'd. Lose my absolute shit and obsess over "well what if he really didn't." What was the last thing that you printed out? Stuff for my Women Writers class. We print out SO much shit there. I feel like I've alone killed at least seven trees by now, and we don't have a choice but to print the readings out. What do you look forward to each day? M a r k/Unus Annus video boiz. What’s the best song to listen to after a break up? "It depends on the context of your breakup." <<<< This. The radio is playing Poison, Inxs, the Psychadelic Furs, Dio, and Matchbox 20 on different stations. What do you listen to? AHHHHHHHHH Poison, my friends. Do you know what it’s like to take care of someone else? Not really, I guess? But yes to a degree: I've babysat twice, and I assume that counts, and then when Jason had bronchitis, I would barely let the dude leave the bed. Would you rather take care of someone or be taken care of? I don't know, I guess it depends on what's wrong? What is the worst 80’s song in your opinion? You're asking someone who loves '80s music. I'm sure there are some pop-ish/more mainstream ones I don't like, but idk off the very top of my head. What song makes you so happy that just want to dance and dance and DANCE? None. What has been your most beautiful magical memorable cloud nine manic ecstatic incredibly happy bouncy air-light moment of this life??? Slow-dancing to "Stairway to Heaven" w/ Jason out in my yard in his headlights the night of prom. It's the reason I absolutely, entirely, 100% cannot listen to the song anymore, no chance. Do you go out of your way for other people? Depends on the person. What’s your favorite short story? I don't know. Have do you feel about beauty pageants? I fucking hate them. It always just feeds the standards of society and makes both women and men hate their bodies. It also puts far too much emphasis on the "importance" of appearance versus personality. What is your favorite DIY related website? I don't do/watch DIY stuff. Do you bruise easily? Very very, but not the ones you usually see clearly. I don't know how my anemia test came back negative. What kind of bread do you like? Pumpernickel is entirely the supreme type, I love potato bread too, I enjoy wheat... Are your air and water as pure as you want them to be? Idk about air, but I'd suppose so; we live in a rural area. Our tap water, I'm positive no. There's some weird shit with our water. The smell is fucking disgusting, like pure iron, but supposedly it's clean... We've had it tested a few times, but there is SOMETHING wrong with it. Would you ever visit an insect zoo? Sure, if they couldn't get on me. Can you enjoy life without stimulants (coffee, cigarettes, drugs, alcohol)? All of those, yes. Does caffeine count? If so, I'm sure I could, but it'd be very hard. How much thought do you put into your dance moves? I don't dance, so like... zero. What is something you want to improve on this year? Just how much I care about others' perceptions of me, mainly over the most trivial of things. If you could, would you want to stay young forever? No, considering I want to die one day. Immortality sounds ew. What is/was your worst subject in school? Mathematics. Are you a sarcastic person? Oh yeah. What role does religion play in your life? A small one. It helps that my religion (or at least the one I relate closest to, Neo-Paganism) doesn't have the most strict doctrine, therefore allowing a lot of wiggle room varying from person to person. Can you sleep with your eyes open? No. In the past week, what song have you listened to the most often? "Broadcast From Beyond the Grave: Death Inc." by Motionless In White. What was the last thing you shared with someone else? I shared some fries with my mom last time we grabbed fast food. While playing video games, do you prefer being first or second player? I don't care, UNLESS I'm showing someone a new game and therefore I know what to click and such to set the game up; in that case, I prefer to be player one. Otherwise, I don't care at all. What is the most difficult word for you to pronounce? HA, currently, my Biology professor's last name. I obviously won't share it, but I always fuck it up. What did you have to do for the last homework you were assigned? I have to watch a movie - The Suffragette - for Women Writers for when I missed it that week I was away from school. What was the last important thing that you thought about? I think if Mom and I really should stock up on food and TP, but to an actually realistic degree. You hear so many different voices on how bad this pandemic is really gonna be. Personally, I think it's an extreme overreaction, but what do I know. I haven't researched. Generally, do you call people, or wait for them to call you? I wait. I hate talking on the phone. Has anyone ever questioned your sanity? I'm sure, including my gd self. I'm 99.99% sure at one point in the breakup's aftermath, I actually was insane by definition. Especially now that I'm mostly recovered, looking back I'm just like... "hun." How many people do you depend on? Just my mom, really, but to a dangerous degree. How many people do you think depend on you? I feel like my mom does, to an extent anyway. I'm the only person who lives with her and I know she loves me, so I'm company for her. Especially now that she has cancer, she's really gonna depend on me during chemo and surgery. What is the worst color combination? Uhhh maybe like. Puke green and brown? Have you ever injured yourself walking around in the dark? Yeah, but nothing severely. At what age did you develop an interest in the opposite [or same] sex? Idk. I was "ew, boys" until I think... late elementary school. Girls, I had my bi crisis in the 8th grade. Then came the denial and shoving into the very back of my skull. I came out as bi though late '17. Are you or members of your family religious? I think my entire family is but me. Well, correction, I have like a mild connection to religion, but definitely not Christianity like the rest. When was the last time you acted like someone you’re not? Good question. It's not something I really bother with anymore. Like, I can curve around things I don't want to share, but I don't fake what I do reveal. When was the last time that you cleaned your room? Actually! I vacuumed and dusted yesterday. Or the day before, not sure. How many hats do you own/wear? Either none or one, in which case it would be a Carolina Hurricanes' cap as a memento I got from one of the hockey games Dad and I went to. Did the last song you listened to hold any special meaning? I actually don't recall what it was. Are you experiencing problems within a current relationship? No. When you’re upset, who do you turn to? Usually Mom. Does winter weather depress you? Noooo! Who was the last person that you called? Me mother. What product was being advertised on the last commercial you saw? I haven't watched TV in forever. When you think about your last relationship, what song comes to mind? "Oh, Pretty Woman" by Van Halen REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE Are there any lyrics to describe your current crush/relationship? Eh. Who in your life makes you the most uncomfortable? Probably my sister's husband, really. I don't think he likes me at all. Treats me decently to my face, but I have my reasons to believe so. Do you ever receive comments on your weight? Not unless I'm at the doctor. Occasionally people who know me well comment I've lost weight, but it hasn't really happened lately now that my weight's slightly risen for who the actual fuck knows why. Don't get me started. Is there anything that you do just to make other people happy? Uhhh just for that sole purpose, don't think so. When you need a temporary escape, what do you do? Listen to music or sleep. What was the last lie that you believed in? I don't want to focus on it. What band would you most like to meet? OZZY. LET ME SEE MY DAD. What was the last thing that you wrote down [with a pen/pencil]? Psychology notes. Has anyone told you that you have a nice smile? Yes. Are you uncomfortable with being photographed? YES. How many people have you talked to today? Just Mom. We woke up in the middle of the night to screeching tires outside; someone lost control of their car because dumbasses go lightning speed around this cure we live on. When you go camping, do you sleep in a tent or an RV? Never legitimately been camping. What’s one ridiculous thing that you do? Let anxiety ruin a lot of opportunities. Do you feel that you must wear makeup to be attractive? Ehhh no, depending on your taste. Ever done anything dangerous while driving with someone else in the car? I don’t drive. Name someone you wish you could be closer with? There's a handful of old high school friends/acquaintances I have on Facebook I really wanna rekindle relationships with. I think I especially would like to get to know Courtlynn better. We seem very similar. What’s unique about your city or town? Its name is shared with a town in Tennessee. Are you a momma’s girl/boy? I'm very close to my mom. What is your favorite dance to do? *shrugs* What is your favorite song to sing? I don't really sing along with songs, but I suppose "Disguise" by MiW. It holds meaning to me and I also just love the chorus. Is English your 1st language? Yes. Did your older sibling ever tell you freaky stories that you believed? I DO NOT know why I remember this, but one time she told me that a boy in her class kept saying the same word repeatedly so many times that it became the only word he could say. It scared me, lmao. Where is the biggest scar on your body? I'd assume at the very bottom of my pelvis where I had surgery. I can't actually see it, but cleaning the area let me know it was kinda long. Do you have a yahoo account? No. Is your mom prettier than you? This is such a mean question, tf. What do you think about guys shaving their legs? You shave whatever you want, boo. Are you a violent person? Not at all, if you don't include my insane nightmares/terrors/whatever they qualify as. Those are always violent. Do you like word searches and cross word puzzles? I do. Have you ever gone to a private school? Yes, my college.

[distant-rose-archive-blog]

52 documents, 5 excel and 30 aesthetics on Little Pirates? Are you kidding? I WANT IT ALL! For real though, that much work into it, how much did/how far did you plot? I'm just curious because I really do love your universe.

Anon, legit Harrison, Wes and Beth are fully realized adults with heartaches, hardships and even their own children in my head. I think I’ve plotted as far as Beth being roughly 50 years old. On top of that, I also had to develop a supporting cast and shit, so there’s development on at least 30 other characters outside of my Jonses children. But if you want a taste of some of the plot work/headcanons I have regarding Harrison, Wes and Beth, I’ve left you roughly twenty plot points/facts I have planned out for them below the cut. So, spoilers, I guess?

Harrison Jones

gentle giant trope as fuck - legit had the body of a linebacker and the soul of a baby deer

looks like he could kill you, but is legit a cinnamon roll

anxious perfectionist puppy complete with slight OCD (has a constant need for organization and will pick up after you without your asking)

serious self-esteem issues/constantly doubts self - compares himself to parents and grandparents too much

a very firm believer in good form/bit of a black and white view on morality - made fun of by morally questionable younger siblings because of this

very much an old soul in a young body

gives so much and expects nothing in return - would give a stranger the shirt off his back

loves food more than he loves you/eats Killian and Emma out of house and home because he is a big boy and LET’S NOT FORGET THE BACON FOLKS! BACON IS HIS ONE TRUE LOVE

hates, legit hates, being compared to his dad/told that he is just like his dad - is deliberately clean shaven and keeps his hair on the long side so people don’t confuse them and people still call him Killian (Is privately like “excuse you I’m like a good five inches taller and at least fifty pounders heavier than my dad” but would never say it aloud because that’s hella rude and he’s a polite mofo)

beanies and bomber jackets forever with this babe

spends a ridiculous amount of time at Granny’s Diner playing darts and fixing things that are broken because he likes being helpful/useful

has a photographic memory and remembers a crazy amount of shit (most likely to catch you in a lie)

will bail you out of jail if necessary but expect a lecture on how you need to clean up your act

Closest to his “cousin” Neal but gets along with most people

Incredibly nice and sweet, but does a psycho mode where if you threaten his family or put a knife to his neck he has no issues snapping your neck/going Freddie Krueger on your ass sometimes blacks out during these violent episodes because he doesn’t like he doesn’t like hurting people and it’s hard thing to put on his conscious

accomplished musician - plays guitar, bass and piano

literally has no clue how handsome/beautiful he is and cannot take compliments/gets super uncomfortable/blushes constantly

Hates coffee but drinks it anyway because he’s a caffeine addict

Has horrible hand-eye coordination as a kid because he was constantly growing and because of that is terrible with swordplay. He got better in his late teens but never picked it up again. Prefers long-range weapons such as bows and throwing darts

legit has the same password for fucking everything - it’s either 1227 (his birthday) or seaweed1227 (Seaweed is his dog’s name)

is legit the world’s most doting and loyal boyfriend/is dating Aladdin and Jasmine’s daughter and worships the ground she walks upon. (He then becomes the world’s most doting husband and father of three adorable babies.)

takes over for Emma as sheriff alongside Neal

Wes Jones

sarcastic asshole magician who is jaded as fuck trope

looks like he could kill you and would probably kill you

has absolutely no filter and doesn’t care if he hurts your feelings

gives zero fucks about authority and goes out of his way to make sure any person of authority knows about it

snarkiest and sassiest mofo alive and enjoys letting you know

most accepting of non-conventional things because he literally doesn’t care and will just go with the flow/won’t even blink at something considered “weird”, he’s more like “yeah, whatever (might or might not have some unconventional relationships of his own regarding Gideon and Bobbi)

is secretly a competitive asshole and will cheat to win/do not play cards with this child

legit hates tomatoes and ketcup more than life itself. Nothing angers Wes more than when his order gets screwed up and he ends up with either. He will actually refuse to eat it.

most likely to hotwire your car or steal your wallet because he’s bored and he can/he would give it back to you at the end of the day however

most introverted out of the siblings/sometimes cannot deal with people/will put up his hoodie and put in his earphones, which is essentially his way of telling you to leave him the fuck alone.

The best with magic out of his siblings since he’s good at compartmentalizing/is constantly practcing and studying magic with Gideon and Bobbi (What I can Baby Robyn in this universe)/ Is basically Power of Three with Gideon and Bobbi

Literally puts no effort into dating/sex life - it’s mainly other people coming to him and he’s like “yeah sure”/possibly aromantic

Doesn’t really crave human contact/interaction but he likes it for the most part. Could live on without it however.

Emotionally unaware at times/a complete idiot when it comes to how other people feel

Though emotionally stunted at times, don’t fuck with his mother, sister, “cousin” Ruthie, Bobbi or Gideon because boy will straight up break your hand to prove a point/A ridiculous dirty ass fighter/will not play by the rules

Has a massive sweet-tooth/constantly has hard candies like mints and caramels on his person

Hoodies are his uniform

Has long ass blonde hair (think Thor or Sunshine from Remember the Titans) and often keeps it in a man bun - Emma HATES it

His iTunes library is bigger than yours/loves music and plays the drums

He doesn’t make a habit of apologizing but if he’s sorry he’s more likely to make a quiet gesture than verbally apologize

Ends up running a music store/backend magic store with Gideon and Bobbi

Beth Jones

daddy’s girl tomboy femme fatale trope aka miss I will fuck you up and you will not only thank me but beg for more

looks like a cinnamon roll but is actually a SINnamon roll…who could kill you

absolutely Daddy’s Little Girl/super ridiculously close to her dad to the point that they’re very good at predicting what the other is going to do/going to react

her most prized possession is her “hook” necklace that her dad gave her on her sixteenth birthday (it’s legit just a fish hook bent to look like Killian’s hook on a chain) and she never takes it off

is left-handed so she had a hard time learning things from people growing up (ex. Harrison tried to teach her how to play guitar and it ended miserably)

loves animals more than she loves people, and will go nuts over cute dogs and cats. Beth has a habit of going up to strange dogs and making kissy noises at them while scratching their ears and never saying a word to the owner

Beth thinks she should be the one to inherit the Jolly and is prepared to fight her brothers for it.

will attack you with your biggest insecurity/weakness if she feels uncomfortable and doesn’t want to deal with something/would rather have a fight than an emotionally meaningful conversation especially on painful topics

scarily manipulative at times and lies super easily/can think of a convincing lie on the spot when necessary - she disturbs her family with this “gift”

really hates disappointing her parents so if she plans on doing something or something happens that she thinks they won’t like, she will do her best to hide it from them

loyal to friends and family to a fault/will go the distance and die for them a thousand times over

loves wearing dark lipstick, it’s her signature make up move

impulsive and legit has negative amounts of self control

Closest to her “cousin” Ruthie - hated each other when they were kids, but get a better understanding of each other when they get older. Ruthie listens to her relationship drama

drop dead gorgeous and she knows it/will use her looks to her advantage if necessary

very casual with sex but fears actual intimacy. She has a really bad relationship when she was 15/16 and it ended horribly after she had pregnancy scare (only Henry knows this about this however)

has an amazing sense of direction/navigation - very good at mental mapping

the best at swordplay out of her siblings and legit spends two hours a day going over her forms and practicing. She also collects swords and makes sure to practice at least two weeks with any from her collection so she’s comfortable with them. Her favorite sword however is a german rapier.

feels out of place in Storybrooke, makes an ill-thought out wish, ends up in the Enchanted Forrest and legit has a pirate adventure to get back home only to decide that she really likes pirating and it becomes her calling she may or may not have a cache of magic beans at her disposal thanks to a certain pirate she befriends on her journey

dates Ariel’s son at one point, it ends in heartbreak (not either of their fault’s though) and makes Beth afraid of the concept of True Love. (he might have or might have not died trying to save her)

may or may not wear a red great coat as part of her pirate uniform

legit becomes frenemies/rivals with Jim Hawkins/she may or may not have a thing or him she totally does

[biohackerblogger-blog]

Want to get ahead in life and live forever? Biohack your brain and body today!!

Welcome back reader. My previous blog discussed what biohacking is and some aspects of human biology that can be tweaked to great returns. Biohacking is basically tweaking your biology to improve your life.

In my self-improvement adventures I use scientific research to justify whatever changes I make to my lifestyle whenever I can. If the science says something shows promise in improving x, y and z—I test it out for myself and if it works, I keep it. I’ve found that Reddit, the popular discussion platform, is a great place to find aggregations of links to relevant literature and is in of itself a repository of anecdotal evidence.

As promised, I’m going to be going more in-depth into my personal biohacking experience in this article, talking about the specific improvements I’ve made to better myself and the scientific justifications behind them.

Supplementation

My primary goal mentioned in my previous blog was optimising cognition. Supplementation seemed like a good way to tackle this issue.

To begin, I started with the basics. Well-researched, basic micronutrients that many people lack in their diets and provide clearly defined improvements. I went to the lab near my house and got bloodwork done, testing for everything (Thank you Belgian insurance).

Omega 3/6 Fatty Acids

These are one of the most well-researched, beneficial classes of molecules that are lacking in our diets today. Alpha-linolenic acid (ALA), found in plant oils such as flaxseed and canola, is an essential fatty acid—meaning your body cannot synthesize it independently so it needs to come from your diet. Eicosapentaenoic acid (EPA), and docosahexaenoic acid (DHA) (found in fish) can be produced by conversion of ALA but in minimal amounts—so practically you’re better off getting these from your diet/supplement also.

Omega acids are a critical component of the membranes that make up the surface of each of your cells. They regulate the fluidity of these membranes, the signaling between cells and also maintain cell structure. They’re also involved blood pressure maintenance, the nervous system, regulating inflammation and have been linked to the prevention of alzheimer's (so cognitive benefits too). This study goes more in depth as to the physical benefits these molecules provide.

People don’t eat enough fish especially in western diets to get enough of these on a daily basis so I would strongly recommend a supplement—this is the one I get. The ratio between the amount of omega-3 to omega-6 is also important and is discussed in this study.

Vitamin D

Our skin produces its own vitamin D when exposed to sunlight regularly. A problem with living in a northern country like England is that there’s not a whole lot of sunlight to go around. This isn’t helped by the fact that we’re not naked cavemen anymore who stand outside all day in the sun. Vitamin D is important for calcium absorption into the bones which is why a deficiency can cause malformations such as rickets. Deficiencies can also cause depressive symptoms and exacerbate mental health issues. Decreased sunlight during winter can also increase the incidence in a temporary depressive disorder known as seasonal affective disorder (also known as SAD—ironic, I know). Light therapy has proven an effective way of increasing vitamin D and treating SAD.

I take it on the reg to stave off the winter blues as a supplement-if I’m happier my brain is happier too. When possible, Vit D from sunlight is a much better source than from a supplement. This is the one I take.

Vitamin B complex

B vitamins consist of 8 different vitamins. B12 is likely the most well known and is involved in neurological function and production of DNA. B9 regulates cell division and formation of blood cells. Each vitamin has specific roles in the body that a deficiency could significantly interfere with. Natural sources are typically animal products and high protein plants.

You can conveniently get supplements that contain all 8 in one which simplifies things immensely. They have been linked to reduction of stress, anxiety and depression and I thought that would be of use to me. I take this one.

Zinc, Magnesium, Calcium and others

Each mineral has a different purpose when it comes to human health but all are important. Zinc plays roles in immune function, DNA synthesis, inflammation and much more. It also boosts testosterone, a hormone providing many health benefits for men (and some for women) that I touched upon in the previous article.

Magnesium can significantly improve your sleep if you get enough of it (and good sleep just improves everything) and calcium is important for bone health. These are all very important micronutrients so make sure you’re getting enough in your diet or supplement them.

Probiotics

You know those icky bacteria lining every inch of your body and intestines? What if I told you that they actually affect your life a whole lot more than you think—Especially your mood.

Research into the gut microbiota (community of microorganisms in the gut) is an incredibly hot topic right now. The presence or lack thereof of certain bacteria in the gut can affect your digestion, risk of developing diseases, even your position on the autism spectrum. It sounds crazy but the research is substantial. Many digestive problems and others can be solved by rectifying the ratios of different bacteria in the gut, by introducing healthy bacteria. I’ve tagged along to a couple of conferences with my psychiatrist mother discussing the interaction between the gut microbiota and health (physical and mental) and have also had several assignments on the topic during my time at university.

I now take a probiotic supplement every morning. Probiotics are basically pills containing millions of live, healthy bacteria.

Creatine

This one maybe isn’t as important for most people but I’ll mention it because it’s part of my daily regime. It’s a very well-researched supplement used by athletes to increase performance by increasing water retention in the muscles. With the added benefit of making your muscles look bigger, creatine can improve strength and endurance during sport. I take it to improve my workouts which itself benefits my life. Optimum Nutrition has some really good products, I go with them. Here’s another review article if you’re interested.

Other cognition-enhancing compounds

(I’m not recommending anyone take any of the following as I am not qualified to be giving out advice on scarcely researched compounds but hey, if you do your own digging, decide the science is sound and there’s no risk, you do you.)

Described above are the supplements I use to benefit my life currently. They are all well-researched staples with plenty of studies to support their efficacy. There are, however, less researched compounds that could be potentially beneficial that are hidden from the public eye.

There exist a number of alternative medicines like St. John’s Wort to treat depression that can have beneficial effects on health. Some medicines are alternative for a reason, we don’t really know enough about them to know how they work but we just know that they do for the most part.

Withania somnifera (Ashawagandha) is a herb that reduces stress and has anxiolytic (anxiety reducing) properties by reducing cortisol, the stress hormone. It’s also implicated in helping with neurodegenerative diseases such as Parkinson's, Huntington's and Alzeimer's disease but more large scale studies are needed to prove it’s therapeutic potential. Lion’s mane mushroom is another cool one thought to also help with cognition that I’ve been looking into recently

Nootropics (cognition enhancing compounds) are quite popular in the biohacking community. Many people take so-called “stacks” of supplements that synergize and work well together. A simple example of a stack would be taking L-theanine and caffeine, (caffeine is the most well-known nootropic) where the caffeine works to give you energy and the L-theanine smooths out the “edge” of caffeine, eliminating the crash you get.

This is gonna be an iffy one to talk about in a uni assignment but I already gave my disclaimer at the top of this section. Microdosing is an increasingly popular trend popularized by big innovators such as Steve Jobs and Bill Gates—It involves taking sub-perceptual doses of psychoactive compounds.

Psychedelics such as LSD and MDMA have become very hot topics of research particularly in the psychiatric field. There is an increasing amount of evidence to suggest their utility in treating addiction, depression and anxiety when paired with psychotherapy. Psychedelics have a very impressive safety profile despite the bad rep they get.

David Nutt, a prominent researcher into the field collated the answers of a panel of experts (from law enforcement to doctors) to attempt to objectively rank common drugs in terms of addictive potential and harm. LSD and Ecstasy are significantly less harmful than the legal substances tobacco and alcohol. The 2017 Global Drug Survey also supports this claim.

Don’t get me wrong, there are some risks to psychedelics if used irresponsibly (such as triggering the onset of schizophrenia in those genetically predisposed to it) but overall, they have untapped potential in research as they significantly increase brain plasticity (ability of brain to adapt and change) and connectivity of neural networks. Microdosing them can increase productivity/creativity and allow the formation of novel neural pathways (which is probs why they help with addiction). I was actually considering psychedelic research as a career path as lots of big names like John Hopkins University are heavily involved in research into the field.

Anyway, some may say that all these supplements are a bit excessive, and maybe they’re right. But I say eh, works for me.

Habits and Lifestyle changes

I discussed the benefits of meditation in my last blog already but that is a very useful meta-tool for improving on all aspects of life. There are small ways we can all change our environments to improve our lives depending on our goals.

Procrastination in particular is a huge issue that many people face, students in particular. Many people struggle to understand why we do this but they aren’t aware that our biology isn’t designed to be able to cope with the huge amounts of stimuli that have arisen from the invention of the internet and social media. It’s now well-known that willpower functions similarly to a muscle—we don’t have an unlimited supply of it, it can get tired. What we can do to get around that is reduce the need to strain that muscle by changing our environment.

I’ve personally deleted all forms of social media I’ve found to not contribute anything meaningful to my life and with the rest I’ve unfollowed/unsubscribed to anything I thought would distract me too much. When studying, I use earplugs to block out as much stimuli as possible and I keep my phone off for most of the time.

This is what my phone’s home screen looks like:      

Simple, practical, not distracting. All the distracting applications like social media are kept on a different screen so I have to put in more effort to get to them. My phone’s also in greyscale but the screenshot doesn’t pick that up. Greyscale removes all the bright colors from your phone screen, significantly reducing the addictive potential of your phone. If you find yourself checking your phone too often, this might help you out.

This article from lifehacker talks about it in more detail. Many phone manufacturers have rolled out updates to help people curb their screen time, adding options to put time limits on your apps and overall screen time.

These are only some of the small changes I’ve implemented.There’s plenty of things you could be doing to make your environment facilitate your goals, you just have to be a bit creative.

That's pretty much an overview of my personal experience with biohacking. I hope you found this interesting and informative and it inspired you in some shape or form to read into science more and improve your life in every way you can.

Thanks for reading,

Alex

Stock images all courtesy of google images

Supplements:

Omega acids -

https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B004MASMXG/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o06_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

Vitamin D -

https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B072L235Z5/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o09_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

Vitamin B Complex -

https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00Z70OUQS/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o06_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

[twruniversity-blog]

Accepted Svalbard ( OC ) !

Okay, cool, you’ve been accepted. Yadda, yadda, I don’t have time to fill you in with all the details. Go bother someone else.

Hurry up. Scram.

IC;

Character: Svalbard

Full Name / Preferred Name: Svana Volkova

Age: 23

Birthday: Feb 9th

Gender: Female

Pronouns: Her/She

Housing: Off campus in a small little cabin located just within the outskirts of the forest, the house is currently being paid by her father and will continue to pay for it so long as she follows through her promises to her family.

Pets: A Svalbard Reindeer named Spits. 

How Spits was smuggled into the country: Don’t ask Svana how it was done. She plainly refuses to really acknowledge it, as thankful as she is to have her dearly beloved pet. Her mother, knowing charms was the one who wished for her to go and study a few years at the university enchanted a small spell onto the Reindeer, causing it to shrink and become the size of a small gerbil. With Spits fitting easily in her pocket, she managed to smuggle the small deer while her mind tried to desperately find a logical explanation to what had just happened.

IC - In Depth;

Magical Branches: Earth, and Ice. 

An odd combo though it is best described as an almost Spring like combination. The choices between the two are based upon the Archipelago of Svalbard, which gets to rather harsh and cold temperatures (Ice) and being named Cold Coast, and the fact that there is a global seed vault located on the main island (Earth). Her strength is certainly the Ice branch with the Earth lacking unless it correlates to plants specifically.

Ahurei (Unique Ability): Her Ahurei allows her to adjust the temperature around her, bringing it down to subzero temperatures within minutes. In this state her eyes appear to frost over and look like they are completely ice, and frost will begin to cover the walls and floors of the room. She is only able to adjust the temperature of a small to medium room. Outside, her feet may be able to momentarily freeze the ground underfoot and plants nearby but nothing terribly extreme. This Ahurei also causes her tears to freeze and is completely controlled based on her emotions.

Because of this, her Ahurei affects her own dna, allowing her body to slow down and survive abnormally cold temperatures without any harm to her body. Though once at a temperature of -40C her body starts slowing down and she starts going into a cryostasis like state for two days before complications may arise. From there the room will stay at the temperature unless an outside force takes effect. Anything below -50C will still kill her.

Major/s: aka: Environmental Sciences, Marine Conservation Minor/s: Ecology and Biodiversity Type of Degree: Masters, excited to go and hopefully get a PhD in the next coming years Clubs: Conservation Biology, Science Society

Appearance: 

Anime FC: Masuzu Natsukawa

Svana is a rather tall woman, standing at 6f without any heels. Her skin is fair, with rosy cheeks and nose making her seem porcelain like. Her hair, a platinum white with a sort of blue hue to it, reaches just past the mid of her back, though most of the time its tied up in a ponytail or bun due to her habits of being in labs at home.  Overall, it’s a fairly simple haircut, two layers, with bangs in a more jagged cut. Her eyebrows are thin, and she does have a bit of pudge on her cheeks which softens her face from her rather sharp and deep blue eyes. There is one black beauty mark under her left eye and a hardly noticeable scar over her left jaw. She doesn’t often smile in public, making her seem rather hostile to anyone she passes by.

Her body frame is a good build, with strong and toned legs and arms. Svana has a slightly pudgy belly, and rather broad plush hips and large chest, having a rather feminine body. However, it is important to note that though she has a rather nice body, she is rather self conscious and chooses to hide behind many oversize layers and always trying to find a way out of wearing a swim suit. She will easily choose getting heatstroke above showing any skin.

Makeup is a rarity for her, she doesn’t own much to begin with so seeing her wear some is a big deal. In fact, she honestly has no clue how to put makeup on let alone even paint her own nails. She never tans, instead burns, and peels away to reveal more cream coloured skin. She does however has a large tattoo going from the back of her thighs, curling over her hips (a link with said tattoo will be put on the blog). On top of the large tattoo, she does have many scars over her left shoulder and back, scars from an animal attack from when she was small. She doesn’t remember the attack though.

Headcanons:

-She does not believe in magic. And will freak out when faced with something that science cannot explain. Though she is capable of learning magic, this denial of its existence is the main thing blocking the way to her controlling her abilities and will take a lot of coaxing out of this mindset.

-She’s related to a certain grumpy, caffeine addicted Norwegian in the school. They are cousins on her mother’s side even though there are times when they both heavily deny it.

-She was homeschooled until now. Because of it, and the fact that she comes from such an isolated area, she has issues making friends and working as a team in group projects and will try every excuse in the book to not hang out with someone.

-She speaks both Russian and Norwegian fluently, them being her first languages. She’s fluent in English as well though there will be times when she mixes up verbs and speaks with a more Russian accent. Additionally, she is capable of reading and understanding most Latin, though speaking it is much too hard for her.

-Svana can’t be away from her Reindeer Spitsbergen, or Spits for short, for too long. She finds emotional comfort in the Reindeer who knows when something is wrong.

-She’s really good at ballet and loves doing it.

-She paints Matryoshka dolls in her spare time. To receive one from her is probably the biggest tell tale sign that she enjoys your company or likes you.

Personality:

Svana is a very meticulous girl, always keeping her full attention on her work and studies, letting her life get so consumed in it as an excuse to not have to interact with other people. This being said, when forced to socialize, she has absolutely no clue how to interact. Often times she will say the wrong thing, easily offending people or worse yet, completely forgetting English and reverting to Russian on accident. She gets rather flustered quickly when anyone takes interest in her, and subsequently tries pushing them away at all costs. Any socializing will cause her to stress and those around her will find that the room will often times drop in temperature.

She always will try to tell herself that there’s no point in even trying to get to know people, beating herself down, and hating with a passion seeing herself in the mirror. A bad habit, always degrading herself and breaking herself down, often causing herself to curl up in her room and cry. A part of her longs to actually make friends but she’s too scared to actually try, making her very close to her parents and her pet. If and when she actually makes friends that she feels she can trust, she may be a bit clingy to them at first. Deep down, all she wants is to be able to make her parents proud of her, she knows they are proud of her grades but she also knows that they worry for their daughter as she is unable to make any friends.

In class she’s quiet, and always handing things in early, asking for extra projects. This isn’t for extra credit as she may claim it to be, but more so for her to find yet another excuse to not socialize. To her peers she may appear as a stuck up know it all, with a habit to be stingy when it comes down to shopping for clothes and going out. The only time when she is willing to pay a good sum of money is when it comes to healthy foods, her pet, and her hobby of ballet (though if she considers someone a dear friend, she will often times spoil them without knowing). Ballet is one of the only times when she is openly herself, and it shows through her dances, and she will become shy and flustered if someone happens to catch her dancing, even if it’s family. Her father was always proud of her dancing capabilities telling her that she should try out for the Russian ballet. She however thinks that she isn’t good enough.

Svana herself is a vegetarian, not because of ideals but more over the fact that her body has issues digesting meats, so eating red meats will make her very sick. This being said, she could probably eat white meats but she never bothers she rather just stick to a salad. She never eats fast food, never having been to a McDonald’s, not like there was one nearby anyways for her to go to, and coffee is rather important to her (and she does put butter in it from time to time as much as she will try to deny it) It is however important to note that when alcohol is involved, and though it takes a lot of it to get her drunk, when drunk or tipsy she becomes the complete opposite, becoming boisterous and energetic and rather touchy feely. She may even strip if someone doesn’t stop her first.

When it comes to the topic of magic, she is stubborn and very set in her opinion. That magic, just does not exist. Even though it is all around her, and she’s at an university for magic, and her cousin and mother both have magical abilities. It does not, cannot, exist. Everything will and can be explained by science, and when she is faced with something that just cannot be explained she will go pale and will most likely faint.

Strengths:

-Intelligent, she easily pass tests with flying colours so long as they are science or math based. Thanks to years of private schooling with her parents she finds these subjects fascinating and rather easy to comprehend, even getting excited for what other students deem to be the “most boring” classes.

-Loyal, when you finally do gain her friendship she will stand by your side through thick and thin and will do anything to keep you out of trouble or get you out of it.

-She’s like a walking talking air conditioner, radiating cold air around herself to keep her cool even in the hottest of months

-From years of ballet, she is quick footed and flexible, in fact, she has found that she can contort her body. Whether that is from ballet or just something she was always graced to be able to do is up for debate.

-Rather rich, her family being scientists both for different countries, make a good sum of money. And her allowance is rather high in comparison with others. Though she does use it to live off of, she is rather simple with living and is more than willing to get a part time job. She never takes advantage of her parents money, and never really takes it into thought that she does have a ‘richer’ family than most.

-Bonus: Her best friend is a Reindeer. She can sing (and she does have a rather beautiful voice) Reindeer are better than people.

Weaknesses:

-Crippling fear of society and mingling. Svana has zero experience in really getting along and socializing with people. Because of it, she will try to shy away from everyone and will often say the wrong things. The only friends she’s ever had before has been her parents, scientists more than twice her age, a vague relationship of 'you leave me alone and I’ll leave you alone’ with her cousin, and a Reindeer.

-Poor teamworking skills, due to the above weakness. She often tries to do things alone and doesn’t trust other’s to do the necessary work. This will often lead to her trying to take over, poor communication, and her doing twice as much work while telling herself it’s 'in case the other forgets’. Most of the time its along the lines of not trusting the other to do a good enough job.

-Self conscious to the extreme. This is more based upon her looks. She often will hide behind bangs, keep her hair tied up and constantly wear over sized sweaters to hide her body. Though she’s strongly opinionated and keeps her head up in public, this self consciousness is only based upon her body. She much rather suffer from heatstroke then wear a tank top, thinking herself to be not at all attractive and scared to show off the many scars that litter her body. It will take heavy coaxing to convince her to go to the beach let alone wear a one piece. And if you manage to get her to wear a bikini you must be some kind of Charisma god.

-Her stubbornness, and refusal to even acknowledge that magic exists at a university for magic.

Backstory:

Svana was born to a Russian father and a Norwegian mother. She was born and raised in Norway, until the age of ten when she moved out to Svalbard with her parents for their studies. There she lived at her parents work until just now moving to the University. She would say that she had a fairly normal upbringing, though to most it would be more unusual. The scientists that her parents worked with all became her family, and she picked up on sciences that most children wouldn’t learn until university just because she was exposed to it. So often times she would go out with the scientists to help gather ice samples, or just enjoy the wilderness of the archipelago. One of the most important moments of her small childhood was when she was around 12 years old and a friend of her parents took her to the seed vault. That was the moment when she started gardening, talking to the plants and learning that she had a rather green thumb, this due to magic that she by accidently used as a child.

She was much more open minded to the idea of magic existing as a child but it all changed one day when she was playing out in the snow at around the age 13. It was a rather calm morning, crisp air when suddenly an odd wind started to blow. No birds sang and the plains itself seemed dead, not a soul was out. The snow swirled as figures of horses seemed to appear, nightmareish mares with half dead riders and ancient weapons strapped to their belts, hooves leaving frozen marks in the soft snow. Svana was terrified but couldn’t move as she stood watching the hellish hunt, until one heavily armoured being paused and looked at her, icy blue eyes piercing her very soul before it pointed to her. One of the hounds, that ran weaving between the horses took sight of her the moment the spirit pointed to her and jumped on her, icy claws digging into the flesh on her back as she rolled over to protect her head. It scratched her, bit her shoulder, leaving cuts and scratches down her back, shoulder and cheek and she felt her blood go cold as ice. And then with a large gust of wind, the hound was gone, as were the riders. She ran home, crying and in pain causing alarm to the scientists. She tried explaining it to them, to which her mother quickly shushed her, and ushered her away to her room. Her father explained to the others that a young polar bear or wolf had hurt the young child, while her mother explained that it was the Wild Hunt that appeared. Since that incident, Svana grew recluse and her mind shut out the terrible memory, instead putting the idea that a polar bear did in fact attack her, and that anything supernatural and magical couldn’t exist. Every time the idea came up, her mind recoiled and tried hiding the terrifying memory. Since the event, however, Svana’s Ahurei became apparent, perhaps a strange gift from the Wild Hunt itself.

Fast forward to a few months before going to TWR, her parents, both wanting their daughter to experience new things made a deal with her. She would be able to go and attend a university of her mother’s choice, and they would pay for her lodgings as well as all courses she wishes to take and all books needed for the courses. On top of it, they would send her weekly allowances for food and necessities. The catch however was that she needed to join school clubs, and not just science clubs, and that she would have to make a conscious effort to make friends and get to know people. If she does not have a social life on the island and in the school after six months of living there, she would have to move into the dorms and would lose all allowances that she gets until the conditions of the deal was met.

Sample RP:

She could deal with the cold, with the wilderness. Heck she could even deal with a Polar Bear attacking her more than she could deal with this island. She cursed under her breath at the idea of her mother sending her this far south. Wasn’t it suppose to be the middle of winter?! And here they were sunbathing and on vacation. And it was HOT. She fanned herself, shielding her eyes from the sun’s harsh glare before taking a deep breath.

“At least we have a place away from people huh Spits,” she reached into her pocket, petting the small reindeer’s head. She ran her other hand through her bangs, before letting them fall into her face, blowing them just a bit out of the way with a huff. She could learn to deal with the heat. Picking up her pink luggage she dragged them behind her, nose in her phone as she looked up directions to where she would be staying thanks to daddy’s money. Sure she had to make friends, and join clubs, but that was a problem for another month…..or two. After all, she had six months to do it, and the rest of summer vacation as a grace period. She hoped. Her mind started to spin at all the what ifs and possibilities. What if she embarrassed herself first class, everyone would stare, what if she was so pastey white that everyone stared regardless. What if she forgot all English, what if she said something funny with her silly little accent….. the list went on and on, and soon her chest started to constrict, cutting all oxygen. Her legs locked where they stood, as she dropped her luggage, hand going to her chest and eyes closing.

“Deep breaths Svana, deep breaths…….” she felt Spits in her pocket squirm a bit as she took deep breaths trying to calm herself. “Deep breaths…..in…….out…..” The ground underfoot began to freeze, layers of frost painting each individual blade of grass, spider webbing from her feet creating a snowflake like design in the ground. With a few more minutes of breathing, the ice melted away and everything was as if it never happened.

“You’ll do just fine Svana,” she reassured herself opening her eyes voice filled with determination, “everyone back home is rooting for you….. this island can’t possibly be all that bad.” And with that, she continued along her way, head held high as she tried to lie to the anxiety that bubbled deep within her.